Therapy Session 1

Oh, um, WOW. I feel... so much better. My first appointment with the therapist was this morning, and OMG, did she do wonders. We got to know each other a little, and we started diving into a few things. She asked how my transgender journey started, and I was a little hesitant, but once I got going I thought "she can't tell anyone anyway." And, she also told me that if I told her something, she'd heard it before... Challenge accep... no, no no no, not in therapy.

Anyway, we talked about trans stuff for a bit, and we got into talking about why I'm hesitant to come out. Turns out (and yes, this may not come as a shock to most of you) that I hard assertiveness issues. Well, I sort of knew that, but her telling me was like this big brick smacking me in the face. She told me that she already sees signs of that improving though, since I was assertive enough to come to therapy, even if just secretly. She also said that that's a sign I'm really sure about this, (which I knew), because if I wasn't, I wouldn't have come.

Let me tell you, I walked out of there, and I let out a big sigh. Just being able to tell someone who can say, "you know what, this could be why"... just, wow. She's very friendly, not your beard stroking, head nodding therapist. She gives lots of feedback, and tried challenging me to a few things. She also wrote down my coming out date (August 23rd), so I'm sure she's going to hold me to that.

And... one thing I'm excited about... she's going to call me Chelsea from now on. *punts Shawn to the side* "Beat it buster!" Sigh. I feel so good right now.

The one thing she challenged me with though, I told her I'd been working on a coming out letter to my parents. She said that, perhaps to work on my assertiveness, I should do it in person. It's a little uncomfortable, especially with my dad. I think my mom might be ok, my dad I can't gauge. But my therapist is right, if I'm going to be their daughter, why hide behind a letter? Tell them to read a letter, and say "hey, you can meet your daughter in 2 weeks"? I'd be annoyed too.

Going back in 2 weeks. Therapy feels so good. Until next time!